(By Tal Gur)

Habits are one of the most important determinants of long-term results. By understanding how habits really work, we have a greater ability to identify patterns that aid us in making new habits stick.

Generally speaking, the habit creation process is a three-part loop:

1. Cue: A stimulus that precedes your habit and tells your brain to go into automatic mode. For example, if every time you drive home from work, you pass a McDonalds sign and crave a cheeseburger. The cue is pretty easy to spot - A big yellow ‘M’ sign.

2. Routine: The series of actions you undertake when you are triggered by a cue (these can be physical, mental or emotional). So in the example above, the brain starts a set of orders that starts with "See a big yellow ‘M’ sign --> crave a cheeseburger".

3. Reward: The immediate benefit you experience as the result of that action. It is easy to identify the reward in our McDonalds example; quick inexpensive meals that taste extremely good.

After a while, this loop “cue, routine, reward; cue, routine, reward,” becomes progressively automatic.

Eventually, a habit is born.

Companies spend millions studying customers' habits in order to tighten this exact habit loop. Every McDonald’s, for example, looks exactly the same so it can serve as a constant cue. And their food is deliberately and repeatedly engineered to deliver immediate rewards.

We usually don't pay attention to the patterns that create our habits. By being aware of them we will be in a better position to challenge habits that don't serve us.

Which brings us to our next point.

How to Effectively Change Unhealthy Habits

Throughout my journey, I made a lot of attempts to change unhealthy habits. It took me a while to see the big picture, but at some point it hit me: Replacing unhealthy habits with healthy ones is much more effective than just stopping them.

Let's say you want to stop eating unhealthy snacks. The question, then, is what will you do or eat instead? If snacking gave you the pleasure of eating something sweet, How about replacing it with healthy sweet dates? On the other hand, if snacking helped you to stave off boredom, how about dealing with the boredom? Perhaps going for a walk instead will relieve the boredom and wipe out the desire of eating at the same time.

The idea is simple. For every habit you want to change, you come up with an alternative routine that will be triggered by the same cue. It would not only make the adjustment easier but also provide an identical reward as the old unhealthy habits. 

How to Make Your New Habits Stick

If you've tried incorporating new habits before, you already know that making them stick can be tough.  What frequently happens is that we usually start out strong and then end up sliding back into our old habits after only a few days. I'm sure you know the feeling...

The skill of making desired habits stick is the most important part of our discussion and it holds the key to successfully and dramatically changing our lives.

I'd like to suggest a simple but extremely effective 4-step process to mastering this skill.

STEP ONE - Identify Key Priorities

Let's face it; no one can get every single thing right. Instead, it's more effective to identify key priorities and turn them into powerful levers that will ripple through other areas of your life.

In other words, some habits matter more than others...

Where to start? Here are some suggestions of beginning positive habits:

1. Read or journal before sleeping

2. Exercise or go for a long walk every day

3. Drink a few cups of water first thing in the morning

4. Give up on a night coffee and replace it with herbal tea

These are some examples of keystone habits that have the power to start a chain reaction which are likely to elevate your life. For instance, when an exercise routine is firmly established, other habits, such as diet and sleeping, fall into place on their own.

Lastly, aim to tackle just a few habits at a time and start with something that is both important and realistic. You can always upgrade your list later when you feel more comfortable with the process.

Step 2 - Build a Powerful Habit loop

The second step is to properly identify the components of your habit loop.

First, identify the routine. This is quite obvious; it is the behavior you want to adopt. Be specific. If your new desired habit is running, how long or how far would you run? Is it a daily or near-daily habit? Would you rather run alone or in a group?

Next is to reinforce a simple but powerful cue for your routine. This is the first link in the chain of a habit which can help you to eventually control the entire behavior.

The majority of habitual cues fit into three categories:

• Location - Where exactly would you be?
• Time - When exactly would you start?
• Scenario - What will serve as a reminder?

Note that I used the word “exactly” a couple of times. By making a new habit more uniform, it will be easier to follow and eventually get more consistent. For example, if you're trying to incorporate a new morning running habit, then a simple yet powerful cue would be to leave your sneakers next to your bedroom door and lace them up as soon as you wake up.

Finally, what would be the reward? Be clear. Will it be a morning treat such as a yummy smoothie? Maybe the sense of accomplishment gained from tracking miles will be the motivating key? How about the endorphins rush and burst of energy that comes from a jog? Or maybe all of them? By having a clear expectation of the reward, a craving for the new activity will naturally develop. In turn, your brain has created a new autopilot!

Step 3 - Start a 21-day Challenge

We already know that getting started and sticking with a new habit can be challenging. Most of our energy, which takes the form of willpower and discipline, is spent in the first few weeks. For this reason, the third step is a commitment to implement the new habit for 3 consecutive weeks. No exceptions.

By week 3, the new habit will be more of a reflex, requiring minimal mental energy to maintain. 21-day challenges work because that is roughly how long it takes for the brain to adjust to the change. Less is usually not enough and more can seem like an overwhelming commitment.  Once you completed your 3-week trial, you can decide if you want to go back to your old habits or continue with your new lifestyle.

Having done many of these trails in the last decade, I’ve found that doing them greatly increases the likelihood of habit formation. A trial is less intimidating to our mind than deciding on a permanent change from the start.

The power of this tool lies in its simplicity. It is important to choose trials that can be done every single day without exception. Otherwise it is too easy to skip a day, lose interest or give up altogether.

The following tips gathered from personal development experts and experienced teachers ensure that you're set up for success:

1. Fully Commit to the Challenge - A 21-day experiment is exactly what it says on the tin: it's not a 1-week experiment; it's not a “do it when I remember it” experiment; it's 21 days. When you make the decision to complete a 21-day challenge, you must commit fully and carefully, so that there's simply no option to quit halfway through, unless it's seriously risking your health, job, or relationships, and you have an extremely valid reason for quitting. If you're not sure how you'll complete 21 days, you haven't made a full commitment; you're just hoping and wishing. Respect the commitment for what it is and give it your all. Also, be realistic—don't do something so difficult that you tire yourself and cannot go on. One example is with exercise: If you usually never exercise, and you set yourself the challenge of exercising every day for 2 hours, you may wear yourself out.

1. Have Big WHY’s Behind You - List your Why’s and make sure they're stronger than the reasons you might have for quitting. As you can imagine, the bigger your list of Why’s, the more likely you are to complete the 21 days. Improving your skills, inspiring others, connecting with people, or simply challenging yourself for the sake of challenge are all valid reasons. If you're the type of person who always quits, then you might consider setting a “quitter penalty.” Make sure others know what you're doing and hold you accountable, so you can't wriggle out of it! If negative “punishments” don't motivate you, go for positive reinforcements instead: what will you treat yourself with when you complete the 21 days?

1. Define Your 21-day Challenge Super Clearly - You must set clear rules and boundaries for yourself, as not doing so sets you up for failure. You'll find loopholes and ways to exploit your pact with yourself, so that by the end, you won't know if you completed it successfully or not. Take for example “21 days of eating no meat”: Are you allowing yourself to eat fish? How do YOU define “meat”? Work it out and write it down. Further, define the minimum level of performance that will give you worthwhile positive results. For example, if you struggle to fit in 1 hour of exercising on a busy work day, allow yourself to exercise for 15 minutes. This way, you've still completed your action and don't need to worry about not having done it. If you default to your baseline too often, you probably won't see the results you had hoped for, but you will still have completed 21 days of your new habit and can strengthen it the next month. Finally, focus on actions, not results. Being too outcome-focused can be counterproductive. The purpose of a 21-day challenge is to lock in some serious life-changing habits that go far beyond the 21 days. 

1. Schedule It & Don’t Skip Weekends - Decide in advance at what time you're going to perform the actions and schedule it in, whether you write it all down in your planner or set up alerts on your phone. Be sure to allow breathing space between working on your habits and everyday life. Furthermore, a 21-day challenge works best when you're required to do the habit 7 days a week—that is, no change on the weekends. This keeps you in the flow, as it's harder to start again come Monday if you've taken the weekend off. It almost makes it as hard as starting the experiment over again from the start. Once the 21 days are up, you'll be able to take weekend breaks with less risk of falling off the wagon! 

1. Prepare Well for the Challenge - No matter how keen you are to start day 1, take some time to prepare first. After all, you wouldn't build a home without a foundation! If you're going to eat healthy, for example, remove all processed foods from your kitchen and clearly define how strict you will be. Also, allow yourself some downtime per day for rest and relaxation. You might feel like you have tons of energy if you've made a switch in your diet, but you may not feel like that every day, and you’ll be glad for that allotted downtime to take a nap, take a bath, or reconnect with loved ones. Fail to prepare and you prepare to fail—this saying never rang truer. You must put the framework into place before you start to set yourself up for success. Another important point: Motivation is usually high in the beginning and naturally takes a dip as you reach the 3–7 day point and realize how many days are still ahead of you. Building your inner strength is all part of an effective 21-day challenge. In a way, your challenge was never meant to be easy, so prepare yourself mentally for this potential motivation slump ahead of time, and you'll be able to face it head on when it happens and plow through.

1. Understated Your Habits & Compensate for What’s Missing - We have unhealthy habits for a reason; there's usually a benefit. Identify the benefit and then compensate for the loss of it. If you're going to cut out junk food, for example, identify the reasons why you consume it. Perhaps you need the energy boost that a can of soda gives you in the afternoon, and you eat chocolate in the evening because you're sitting in front of the TV. Switch out the unhealthy sugary foods with some healthy sweets, like a piece of fruit or dates, to enjoy in the evening.

1. Put yourself in the Right Environment - Try to distance yourself from negative people who will resist the changes you're trying to make and, whether harmlessly or not, try to drag you down. Avoid going to your parents’ place for dinner if they don’t believe in veganism! Try to surround yourself with people who will help and motivate you, the people who are rooting for you to succeed. 

1. Consider Sharing your Experiment - Sharing your experiment with a friend, coach, or an accountability partner can strengthen your commitment, making it easier not to skip a day or give up. This can be especially effective if you’re the type of person who hasn’t built up the ability to count on yourself. Sharing your experiment or even announcing it publicly can inspire and help others as well. The downside is the extra level of commitment and potential stress that may come as a result of it.

1. Consider Starting Small - If you've never done a 21-day challenge before, consider starting smaller with a 7-day challenge. When you complete your shorter experiment, you can expand it, going from 7 days to 21 days or even longer without the pressure of having committed to 21 days right from the start. Similarly, if you have a pattern of not completing challenges or experiments, then drop down to shorter experiments to build up your inner strength, so that you keep taking action rather than giving up when hurdles happen. Be sure to nail the smaller experiments and then, when you're successful at completing shorter experiments, you can go back up to 21-day challenges and beyond, perhaps even completing a 60- or 365-day challenge in the future. When and if you don't complete an experiment, don’t blame yourself. Let it be because the weight was too heavy to lift, not because you didn't give it your all. Then you'll be able to try again, the first attempt making you stronger than the second, rather than making you feel full of regret and like a failure.

1. Transforming 21-Day Challenges into Rituals - If you've successfully completed a few 21-day challenges and are ready to integrate them into your life, then consider creating an ongoing daily ritual. For example, your morning ritual may include getting up at sunrise, meditation, exercise, and drinking green juice. Daily rituals are beneficial because all of our behaviors are linked; they trigger each other. For example, by getting up at sunrise, you've instantly found the time you need for exercise, and this triggers a surge of energy to set you up for a successful day. Daily rituals are ideal for conducting a holistic rebalance across all areas of your life. This should include: your body (exercise or changing your diet), your mind ( reading personal development books or listening to inspirational talks), your work (checking emails once per day or working on your website), your spiritual life ( meditation or journaling) or just for fun (sketching, showing gratitude, and so forth). One last piece of advice: Don't think that you must start everything on the same day. Stagger the starting days so that you start a new habit every once in a while. It will give you time to focus on the important things first and then build up.

Exercises | Downloadable Workbook

***



Apply What You Read

* On average, 90% of what we read is forgotten within the first hours after reading...  This is why it's important to apply what you read. Enroll to the Supportive Habits Study guide and get instant access to a downloadable workbook and self exploration exercises.

** With Elevate Uni’s All-Access Pass you can get unlimited access to a growing collection of study guides, courses and actionable resources from the best minds in leadership, business and personal growth. Each resource includes not only in-depth insights but also self exploration exercises, reflective questions and action points so you integrate what you learn.